Hukuman? Judgement.. hukuman lah kan in Malay?
(
I'm not sure the direct translation of judgement or judging in Malay.. so, bantai ajerlah ye?)
I had a long talk with one of my closest colleagues tadi. We were just randomly talking about life, attitude, gossips and the after effects. And man... life is indeed a karma.
Now a days, in the news you'll be surprise with what is happening around you.
Mak bunuh anak.
Anak tetak mak.
Bapa rogol anak.
Abang rogol adik.
Parents tinggalkan anak2 sebatang kara.
Parents jual anak.
Jiran having intimate affairs.
Mertua punca cerai.
Parents punca cerai.
Remaja ada anak tidak sah taraf.
Penyakit pelik2.
Adik beradik tak bertegur sapa.
Orang Kaya Baru tak sedar diri.
Maruah perempuan is like, nothing!
Parents dibiarkan tua begitu sahaja
Now that I list everything out, I don't know which one to start.
Let's start about parenting. I am not a parents myself yet. But my circle is at all stages of parenthood.
What I can see, there is never a right or wrong in being a parents or on how you handle or educate your children. But, what is important is the basics in life. Teaching them to respect, to be fair, to share, to be decent.
It is ok to have some sort of standard of your own, but it is not ok if sampai tahap jadi disrespectful. Contoh; you tend to educate your children to be friended or to mix around only with a certain type of people. To make it worst, even among families. Your children are only allowed to be nice to Aunty A, Aunty B but not Aunty C. It's because Aunty C is just an ordinary medium class Aunty. Not those posh rich Aunties.
So, anak2 yang baik tiba2 dah jadi disrespect. Even though you had everything covered for them both ilmu dunia and akhirat... but at then you are building their attitude menjadi kurang ajar and memilih tak bertempat.
It is good untuk bagi anak2 bercampur dengan sekeliling yang bagus dan high standard. Tetapi, you have to allow them to mix around. Supaya in the future, when you are not around... dia senang bergaul ketengah ketepi... dan yang paling penting, semua orang akan senang with them.
Parents hanya nak yang terbaik untuk their children but along the way, they screwed up without realising it. Anak2 you tak membesar sekelip mata. Support system sekeliling you yang banyak membantu you from Day 1. You like it or not, you owe them. But of course, di dalam dunia sekarang, akhirnya parents yang tolong tengokkan cucu ni akhirnya jadi obligation pulak. Belum lagi hati yang terguris sebab dah lah orang tua tu tolong jaga cucu tu.. tapi tak boleh cucu kena marah sikit.. dah anak menantu pulak hentam orang tua tu...
Berdosa, tau tak?
Mak ke.. Mak Mertua ke.. hukumnya sama. BERDOSA.
Itu belum lagi yang masa berlengas, orang lain tengok2 kan.. bila dah besar baru parents take over. Terus take over sampai lupakan langsung sejarah silam. Support system yang di gunakan dulu ni kemain terkapai kapai sahaja dibiarkan. Siap anak2 tu menyombong lagi dengan the support system tu.
Nampak tak?
Tujuan asal nak bagi the best education ever. Nak educate the best.
Akhirnya, jadi disrespectful.
Bukan semua, but hampir semua.
Yang buat, tak akan sedar. Tapi, yang dibuat sangat terkesan.
Ada tu anak2 ramai, Alhamdulillah semua ada bahagian masing2.. Tapi tak larat nak jaga ibunya.
I am agak terkesan with my cousin's statement baru ni.. "I don't want to put any of my children's name.. sebab nanti, even I am still alive, depa dah hantaq me to old folks home..."
and no, anak2 nya sangat baik budi jaga dia semua. Cuma dia berjaga-jaga kerana hati manusia ni, bila Allah nak duga, kena pusing tu sekelip mata sahaja.
Awak ada rumah, dia pun ada.
Rumah dia kecik, tetap namanya rumah juga.
Awak ada kereta, dia pun ada.
Kereta awak lebih hebat? Tapi, kereta dia senantiasa membawa ibunya berjalan2.
Life ni simple jer.
Jangan mula pertikaikan hak orang.
Jangan mula compare dan up ego sombong dengan orang.
Darah sama merah.
Kalau sakit, kat bank blood tu tak sempat pun nak pilih darah orang kaya only.
Kalau meninggal, tak sempat pilih pun orang kaya je allowed nak tolong angkat you masuk kubur.
Dalam mengeducate anak-anak... we should educate ourselves as well.
Jangan baru join usrah, terus buat dalil. terus jatuhkan hokum kat orang.
You tak tau apa amal dia.
You tak tau macam mana hati dia.
Kesimpulannya... bersederhanalah.
Campur lah dengan masyarakat.
Jangan sombong.
Lebih kronik. Jangan bodoh sombong.
Love,
Ayu